I think I get it now. Regardless of how some childhoods can seem many of us didn’t feel validated, seen or heard (sn: the best animes begin this way ) Many of these arguments are just us living in the past taking out our frustrations of a world invalidating us on others who also experienced the same frustrations.
Damn so as a collective we’re trauma bonding? I mean as an entire community. We argue with each other about opinions like they’re life and death. And I don’t mean opinions like your identity I mean opinions like differences of upbringings will make you think someone is invalidating you which in turn is like being cursed out. Our opinions to us ARE our Identities I mean they’re based on our lives it’s hard to sometimes compartmentalize and that’s where it goes left.
But acknowledging other experiences before writing it off and actively listening could change the entire way these conversations go. Probably why agree to disagree feels like disrespect. Also it helps if before you attack you don’t think of attacking them but instead think of them as aliens and it as an opportune time to see how they came to a different world. Also make sure you’re understanding their language and comprehending their words. All easier said than done.
Communication is hard. Wish it could be much easier. I say this to also say make sure you’re raising kids to become adults who don’t project their traumas in online debates.
Yoruba Demons 